JACKSONVILLE, Florida -
Jeff Waters walked into a Bank of America Monday
morning and attempted to cash a check for $
368,000,000,000 dollars. The check Waters had written
to 'Cash' was reportedly from U.S. Bank of Idaho and
issued in the 90s. Tellers at the Jacksonville bank were
immediately suspicious.
Check scan – Courtesy Jacksonville Sheriff's Department
Waters explained to bank officials a homeless man
named Tito Watts sold him the blank check several
months ago for $100 and told Waters the check would
clear for any amount of money that Waters wanted to
write it for.
Waters wanted the $368 billion to start an Italian
restaurant.
"It's always been my dream to own the best Italian
restaurant in the earth," Waters told police. "I'm 10%
Italian. Cooking authentic Italian food is in my blood. I
had planned to make the restaurant 80 million sq. feet
and able to accommodated (sic) 30 million eaters at
once, plus it was gonna be totally underwater so people
could look at sharks while they ate. But the bank
wouldn't give me my money they owed me. Tito said the
check was good for any amount I wanted to write it for.
So blame Tito, not me. I'm as innocent as a schoolgirl."
In addition to a forgery count, Waters was charged with
unlawfully carrying Chinese throwing stars and
possessing bath salts. He was released after posting $
23,000 bail.
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